I was Part of the Problem

Making people less than human.

People would be up in arms if someone would think of me as just a disability. Think of me as just a crip. Think of me as less than human.

But as the news of a few weeks ago has shown, some people still think of women as a sexual object and not a human being.

As a porn addict, I was guilty of that. (See “My Dirty Little Secret”.)  Anyone who watches porn is part of the problem.

Less than Human1I am referring to the Stanford student who raped a girl behind a dumpster at a party. Behind a dumpster as if she were garbage. If you want more information, go to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/People_v._Turner and for the girls impact statement go to http://tinyurl.com/hcb9ol5. Her statement was powerful. As I was reading I was becoming angry and disgusted, as a lot of people around the country were as well.

After awhile I began to realize that I’m not any better than that kid. I’m not a rapist but when I was watching pornography I was viewing the women on the screen as objects to be used for my pleasure. That is exactly how that young man treated his victim.

According to a study published in Child Abuse Review in 2009,

  “exposure to pornography helps to sustain young people’s adherence to sexist and unhealthy notions of sex and relationships…” and “consumption intensifies attitudes supportive of sexual coercion and increases their likelihood of perpetrating assault.”

While not all viewers of pornography become rapists, men who regularly watch are 22% more likely to commit a sexual crime (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOLAJw7kVcA). Also, according to a study in 1988 by researcher Dr. W. Marshall “86% of convicted rapists said they were regular users of pornography, and 57% admitted direct imitation of pornographic scenes when they committed rape.” It might be an old study but it was at a time when you had to go to an “erotic bookstore” to find most porn. Today you simply have to turn on your computer. Continue reading “I was Part of the Problem”


Love Loud

I’m sure you have heard about the tragic events that took place in Orlando over the past weekend. I have heard many different reactions and responses since then. Some appropriate and some inappropriate. Political and religious. Loving and hateful.

I am not going to get into the issues of homosexuality, gun control, and terrorism. I just want to remind people of Jesus’ words when it comes to loving our neighbors and helping others. I’m sure no matter what I write I’ll still piss somebody off, though.

Love LoudFirst, I want to address the churches who rather than offer help and support for the victims and their families, took the opportunity to condemn and preach hate. Listen to Jesus’ words regarding the Pharisees (the religious zealots of his day) in Matthew 23.

“So practice and obey whatever they tell you, but don’t follow their example. For they don’t practice what they teach. They crush people with unbearable religious demands and never lift a finger to ease the burden.” – vv. 3-4


“What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you shut the door of the Kingdom of Heaven in people’s faces. You won’t go in yourselves, and you don’t let others enter either.” –  v. 13

Who do you think shows the love of Christ at work in their lives? The churches who were spewing hate or the churches who either helped or at least took the time to pray and participate in some of the vigils.
I commend not just churches but the Christian and nonchristian individuals who offered help and support. I am sure it was appreciated.  Continue reading “Love Loud”

What I Learned from Captain America: Civil War

If you’re a Marvel fan and haven’t seen the movie you don’t want to read this unless you like spoilers. Also, if you’re a Marvel fan and haven’t seen it, what are you waiting for. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.



In the beginning of the movie, The Avengers were after some bad guys. One of the bad guys was about to cause an explosion in a crowded marketplace, which would have caused hundreds of deaths. In the process of stopping this, The Avengers inadvertently caused an explosion killing 11.

Because of this the U.N. decides to put them on a short leash. They want The Avengers to sign an agreement only to act at the discretion of a Task Force run by the U.N. Half of them think it’s a good idea while the other half see how the agreement will cause more unnecessary deaths because of the red tape of bureaucracy.

Captain America is the main opponent of this, of course. During all of this Peggy Carter dies. At the funeral her niece quotes Peggy as saying:

“compromise where you can, but where you can’t don’t. Even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. Even if the whole world is telling you to move. It is your duty to plant yourself like a tree, to look them in the eye and say, no, you move.”

There was a time when we as a country believed in doing the right thing for the right reason. I think this was true of most people regardless of their country of origin. That doesn’t seem to hold true anymore. People are so afraid of hurting someone, they don’t stand up for anything.  Continue reading “What I Learned from Captain America: Civil War”

Lead us not into Temptation

While fighting a porn addiction, I finished a life lesson in Temptation.

I used to feel so guilty when I would be tempted. I felt dirty and unworthy of God’s love.

downloadMy accountability partner set me straight. He said that being tempted was not a sin. It is what you do AFTER the temptation that makes the difference. In fact, my accountability partner went as far as say that if Temptation was a sin, then Jesus sinned when Satan tempted him in the desert.

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.”  ~Matthew 4:1

The bible says we all sin.  The bible says we are all tempted.

“But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire.”  ~James 1:14 (ESV)

It is NOT the temptation that is the sin, but what I do about it.  If we continue looking into Matthew 4, Jesus answered each temptation with scripture.

  • Verse 4:  “No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.”
  • Verse 6:  “For the Scriptures say, ‘He will order his angels to protect you.  And they will hold you up with their hands so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.”
  • Verse 7: “The Scriptures also say, “You must not test the Lord your God.”
  • And finally in verse 10:  “Get out of here, Satan,”…..”For the Scriptures say, ‘You must worship the Lord your God and serve only him'”

Continue reading “Lead us not into Temptation”